I just read a great post by Anne Warfield over at Anne Warfield’s Presentations Skills Blog entitled “Do Ethics Only Count When People Are Looking?” and it reminded me of a similar situation I witnessed the other day in the grocery store.

I was in line between a mom with small children and a couple of
teenagers.  We were all watching a man take forever to count his
change, when he looked up and said, “You’ve given me too much change. 
You should have given me a ten and you gave me a hundred.”  The
embarrassed cashier gratefully took the hundred dollar bill and gave
him a ten.

“What’s he doing?” asked the little boy with the mom.  “The lady
gave him too much change and he’s giving it back,” his mom replied. 
“Why is he doing that?” the little boy asked.

Now this is where it gets interesting.  I could hardly wait to hear
how this young mother would use the opportunity to teach her son about
honesty.  But before she could answer, I overheard the teenagers behind
me say in a belligerent voice, “Because he’s stupid.  He should have
just taken the money and been on his way.  This store’s probably ripped
him off plenty of times.  That was his chance to get even and he blew
it.   Of course the mother leaned down, took her son in her arms, and
gave him a simple, easy-to-understand explanation of why we give the
money back to the nice lady.

For my part, I was shocked (maybe I’m a Pollyanna, but I really was
shocked.)  In my mind, I don’t even have to ask the question.  I just
give it back.  These teenagers had already made the decision to exploit
such an opportunity if one ever arose.  They had already justified to
themselves, and their decision seemed perfectly rational (to them.)

I guess it’s obvious how I feel about that.  My father was a crusty
old bird whose world didn’t include much grey.  Things were pretty
black and white for him.  But he had a way of distilling things down to
their essence.  Here’s how he would say it:  “If you’re honest, nothing
else matters.  If you’re not honest, nothing else matters.”  ‘Nough
said.