You’ve heard the old saying, “You might win this battle, but you’re going to lose the war.”  It’s true.  Seldom does one battle turn the tide in the war.  You’ve got to be very careful which battles you fight and why.  A few days ago I talked about controlling your emotions.  No place is this more important than picking your battles.  Being angry and wanting your “pound of flesh” is a very poor reason for fighting a battle.

I heard from a friend the other day who is a partner in a trade school.  She decided to attend the school as a student and asked that the teachers treat her like a student.  So far so good.  Then one day, my friend had scheduled time out, and was going to be gone.  A teacher came to her and told her she had things for her to do, and she couldn’t leave.  My friend tried to explain diplomatically that she couldn’t change her plans and would be leaving.  The teacher / supervisor was angry and went to the GM and complained.  He explained to the teacher that at the end of the day my friend was an owner, and that she should just let it go.  But she wouldn’t.  She continued to fight it.  And worse, she went to the other teachers and tried to garner support for her frustration.  In short, she’s spreading hate and discontent all over the company, among teachers and students alike as she fights this.  She’s in this battle to the death.

Frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised if death was where this ended up.  If the teacher can’t let it go, it will likely be the end of her time with this company.  What she apparently can’t understand is that this particular student is an owner, and as such wil take the occasional perk.  For the most part (99% of the time) she’s a good student and acts like and is treated like all the rest of the students.  But from time to time, she’ll play her owner card and do something outside the ordinary.  I’d say it’s her business and there ought to be some perk for providing everything she provides to everyone else.

But the point of all this is this:  The teacher has an emotional investment in this whole situation.  She’s angry or frustrated or whatever and has chosen to fight this battle.  You and I can see that this battle is un-winnable.  Why would you risk your job (in a horrible economy) over a battle you don’t have a snowball’s chance in [that really hot place] of winning?  If you follow that thought to its conclusion, you can only deduce that you lose.  Again, why would you do that?

The bottom line:  Pick your battles carefully.  Fight only those battles you can win.  And even then, don’t fight a battle you can win if it’s not going to contribute to winning the war (and particularly not if it’s going to contribute to losing the war.)